Wendy Lowy Sloane began her media career with a dream job working for the legendary talk show host Phil Donahue and produced radio shows for Geraldo Rivera and Danny Bonaduce (of Partridge Family fame) before launching her syndicated talk show What’s Up with Wendy at WGCH in Greenwich.
A few years ago, the former New Canaan resident switched gears for a more personal broadcast: a divorce-themed podcast, called The Rewrite, which champions personal reinvention after all kinds of major life transitions.
We chatted recently about the upbeat positivity Sloane brings to discussing often tough subjects and her goal of inspiring listeners to rewrite their personal stories and begin again, just like she did.
MM: The first time we talked, you had just launched What’s Up with Wendy. How did you go from a newsy, entertainment-style program to talking about divorce?
Wendy Lowy Sloane: During Covid I stopped going to the radio station. I was recording from home in New Canaan. My kids were home, and I liked that a lot. And I began thinking, “I’m going to transform this into a podcast.” I had started out focused on newsmakers, authors and celebrities—which was my background coming from Phil Donahue. But I was also feeling very reflective about some of the things I experienced going through my own divorce [2008]. I wanted to share some of the things I wished I had known, but didn’t. And one of the things that I had learned was that as bad as it can seem when it’s happening, divorce doesn’t suck, which is what we originally called the podcast.
The podcast did well, but I never really loved the name. I realized it really didn’t reflect the conversations we were having. It wasn’t so much about divorce—and how to do that—it was about healing and the reinvention that can come from reclaiming your story.
MM: What didn’t you know about divorce when your marriage ended?
WLS: Back then, I felt like no one was getting divorced in my town but me. When this is happening and you have little kids, like I did then, it can feel isolating. I didn’t have a lot of people to turn to, so I didn’t know a lot of facts. I didn’t gather enough information. I rushed through everything. In every state there are rules about divorce that can really govern the process, and I didn’t know enough about those.
I really didn’t know what questions to ask lawyers when I met with them. And one thing I didn’t realize was that lawyers are only one part of the team that you may need to support you. You need financial advisors and other experts on your side, too.
MM: Are there any particular myths about divorce you want to dispel?
WLS: Just because you’re getting divorced doesn’t mean your life is over. And it definitely doesn’t mean that you’re a failure. Just because your marriage didn’t work—regardless of the circumstances—this isn’t a statement about your personal worth. It means that you are brave.
GM: What’s your best advice to anyone considering divorce?
WLS: Don’t stay for the kids. I under-stand all the reasons why people might do that, but the kids know there is something wrong. They always do. If you focus on reinvention and building a new life for yourself, that can be an inspiring thing for them to see.
MM: What about dating? How do you navigate meeting people today when the dating landscape has changed and so much of the connecting happens on smartphones?
WLS: I always tell people to do all of that slowly. Too many people jump right back in. I find that’s especially true with men; they seem to kind of hate to be alone. But there are plenty of women who rush to do it, too. I tell people to learn to be alone. Take the time to reflect on what you’ve learned from your marriage.
I am currently single by choice and have been for a long time. I didn’t pursue relationships when I first got divorced and my kids [son Jake and daughter Summer] were young. I wanted to focus on them. I realize that’s a choice, but it’s one I don’t regret. But for people who want to date, I’m encouraged by what I’m seeing on the dating sites. They are improving. I interviewed someone recently about the positive impact technology and even artificial intelligence is going to have on them. It’s going to be harder to do things like fake a profile. I’m even encouraged by shows like The Golden Bachelor. It’s sending a positive message that we can find love again and rewrite our romantic stories at any stage of life.
GM: You recently rebranded and changed the name of the podcast. What was behind that?
WLS: We are now focused almost solely on themes of reinvention and healing. Sure, I may still have on a divorce lawyer or marriage counselor or someone who has gone through a divorce, but it’s become much less about the how-to of divorce and more about how to move on from what can be a really devastating experience. So, while divorce is still part of the conversation, I’m also thinking about widowers or people who’ve experienced job loss. It’s about healing in a way that could get you to lead your best life and to rewrite your story. It’s about saying, “Okay, I fell down, but I can get back up.”
One of the things that I think sets me apart is that I’m committed to not going to the ugly or bad parts of divorce. They exist, but I don’t want to have this be about messy stuff. I don’t go there. What I’m doing is intended to be uplifting. Recently, I had on a former Buddhist monk who now works to lead people through deep personal transformations, and he was full of so much wisdom. I’m really hoping to inspire people and give them some tools for really living their best lives.
MM: Who is your dream guest?
WLS: Maria Shriver. She went through this very high-profile divorce from Arnold Schwarzenegger, and she’s built a platform around purpose and reinvention. Through The Sunday Paper, her Alzheimer’s advocacy and her Women’s Alzheimer’s Movement, she has transformed personal pain into purpose. She knows what it’s like to lose a version of yourself and focus on what comes next.
MM: You’ve had your own rewrite. How would you describe it?
WLS: From my career as a television producer, to a suburban mom, to a single mom, to a radio show host and then relaunching as a podcast host, I have rewritten my story so many times. And I’m still rewriting it. My kids are off living their best lives and I’m so proud of them. A few years ago, I sold my house in New Canaan and moved to this amazing island community off Norwalk. I didn’t know anyone and it felt kind of scary. But I love it here. Every day I wake up and I’m happy. I’m living my best life and I’m trying to help others do the same thing.