Hardly a week passes lately, it seems, without someone pitching personal finance or investing seminars and services to women in lower Fairfield County. Many come with breezy titles like “Wine, Women and Wealth” or “Investment Lingo.” Others come with a warning, like a recent financial workshop at the Darien Community Center: “Divorce Changes Everything: Find Your Independence.”
Why the sudden female focus?
“Women are being recognized as a powerful economic force in the economy. Many are taking a more active role in finances,” says Donna Phelan, an investment advisor from Stamford who has worked with thousands of women during her eighteen years with Wall Street investment firms. She’s the author of the new book Women, Money & Prosperity: A Sister’s Perspective on How to Retire Well.
Many women are earning more, contributing to and controlling their 401(k)s, and receiving an unprecedented transfer of wealth following a loved one’s death more than ever before, Phelan reports, and these characteristics are attractive to advisors. Then there’s the dark side—divorce, crushing college costs, job loss and death of a spouse. “That’s where the talk of finance is dropped in a woman’s lap,” she says. “In Fairfield County we see women who are divorced or widowed trying to hold on to the house or to carry it. They don’t know what to do. They try to hold on and hold on until they have nothing left.”
Phelan wants women to understand they can take control of their finances before their finances take control of them. After all, that’s what she did. Prior to working as an investment advisor, she was a self-employed jewelry designer in Stamford who counted Tiffany & Co. and Cartier as clients. She wanted to grow, “but when it came time to get financing, I didn’t know how to negotiate for a loan. I said this could take my business down, not knowing about money.” She changed course and headed to UConn for an MBA in finance. Then she became an investment advisor. Her male clients had a “more risk-taking profile, and there was more emphasis on stock trading” when she began. “Fortunately, we’ve moved to more of an investment approach, a planning approach, and in that area women shine.”
Phelan says women need to stop apologizing or feeling guilty for money missteps like credit card debt and ignorance about retirement savings, and to empower themselves with knowledge. “Women tend to abdicate in their relationships. Instead, have money conversations regularly. It’s never too late to have that conversation. When you become financially literate, you become empowered.”
She also recommends that women partner with friends to create several income streams that will help sustain them as they retire, much as people gather with friends to form book clubs. “Rather than just discussing the latest book, they can strategize and brainstorm for income streams. It’s not limited to ‘Let’s pick a stock of the week,’ but ‘How can we pool our talents and resources and ideas to generate income streams when we retire?’ ”
Finding an Advisor
Tips when shopping for a financial advisor
Get referrals from other women, then meet the advisors one by one to determine where there’s a comfortable fit. If you’re skittish about going, call a friend and go to the meeting together.
Select an advisor who asks what you have been through and seems to care about you and your family and your financial goals.
Stay away from someone who is only trying to sell you something.
Stick with someone who understands your money values and goals and who will meet with you regularly to make sure you’re on track.
Admit what you don’t know; opt for an advisor who communicates clearly in words you understand.
Don’t waste your time with someone who makes you feel stupid.
Make sure you and your advisor both know that you will be equal partners in the decision-making at the table.